Never Fry Bacon Naked, and Other Things Mama Never Told You

Disclaimer: Not all of the experiences in this post are mine. I’ve collected stories from my friends, too; and if it sounds like something that happened to a guy, it probably was.

My mama never mentioned that it was a bad idea to fry bacon while naked . . . seems to me that would have been good information to have, right up there with “don’t touch a hot stove” and “the red end of the cigarette HURTS.”

Customer No-Support

I’m going to do an off-topic rant . . . I know there are tons of people out there that are going to agree with me, and many that won’t, but I’m VERY frustrated at the moment. I’m sorry if it sounds like I’m a prejudiced bitch – my family immigrated to this country, we’ve just been here a while and lost the accent. I really don’t have issues with anyone who’s trying to make their lives better, I’d just like to be able to UNDERSTAND what’s being said to me. If someone is being paid to speak English to native English speakers, they need to speak it clearly.

Have you had to deal with out-sourced customer support yet? Not only are most companies outsourcing their support, the majority of those are off-shoring as well. That pisses me off for a multitude of reasons, but the biggest one is the fact that I can very rarely understand what the hell these people are saying. For heaven’s sake, you’re selling your damned product in the United States, so why is it that the people you hire to provide your customer support can’t speak clear English? (Question for our native Spanish-speakers: do you have the same problem? When you request Spanish, do the customer support folks you talk to have such a heavy accent or such awkward phrasing that you have difficulty understanding them?)

The online support isn’t much better, either. I don’t have to deal with an accent, and in most cases the support folks spell well enough that I know what word they intended, but the phrasing is still awkward so interpreting what they MEAN isn’t always easy. If someone is supposed to be helping me fix a problem with a piece of equipment I purchased, they can’t do their job if I can’t understand what they’re telling me to do to resolve the issue.

It wouldn’t be so bad, but if I have the nerve to say, “I’m sorry, I’m having difficulty understanding what you’re saying, could I speak to someone with less of an accent?” they get insulted and hang up on me, so I have to start all over. For heaven’s sake, I’m getting older, my ears don’t work as well as they used to, and then you throw in a phone connection to another continent – I’m already having trouble, and that’s if I’m talking to someone I KNOW and talk to all the time. Throw in an unfamiliar accent, and I’m screwed. I have no hope of getting anything useful accomplished under those circumstances. I really don’t intend to insult these folks, but if I can’t figure out what they’re saying, they can’t help me; and the next time something needs replaced, I’m NOT going to buy that brand.

**If you are reading this post anywhere other than wendyburnett.wordpress.com it is because it has been stolen. Please click on the link provided to return to the site of origin.